It ain't me babe

Today....is one of my bad days. It's been so long since I've had one, and I forget how to handle it. If we put my life on rewind for 6 monthes I would've handled today by drinking a bottle of liquor or hurting my body. But now all of those things are sworn off because I'm trying so hard to become a new person. Its not that I don't like who I am now, I just am learning to love myself and am making some personal changes in my personality, and working on developing some of the traits I admire in people but cannot claim for myself, such as:

Acceptance
Alertness
Blissfullness
boldness
Calmness
Charm
Caring
Direction
Discipline
Faith
Fashion
Fidelity
Grace
Humility
Strength
Tranquility
Warmth

Through my journey of developing these traits, I hope to discover what it is that causes the good days and the bad days. Strength is probably the biggest obstacle to overcome, because I am very weak to my emotions. Even today was caused because I allowed my imagination to pair up with my emotions and lead me over a cliff. Luckily, listening to show tunes can help any girl feel like it will all be ok in the end.

Be spontaneous,
Hayley

Living in a fishbowl

These past few weeks have been packed, but I can't remember what they were packed with. There's swimming every morning and capoeira whenever I have time. I'm learning to play Stairway to Heaven. The TAB on that song is so freaking long! I'll never memorize it all!

So I've begun to try to think that we all have so little control over our lives that why don't we just live up the time we have. We each get about 70 good years of living, and why would you waste them on trying to achieve society's idea of perfection? People waste their entire lives on working and trying to get more material things. But if you have clothes on your back, food to eat, and a place to sleep, then you have everything that you need. From there on out it should all be about doing what makes you happiest!

And I can't wait to go to California!

Love,
Hayley

Ladies and Gentlemen, Physical Exercise!!

My summer has officially begun! And I am already sensing a trend. I exercise all day, socialize at night, and sleep whenever the opportunity presents itself. Since I am a natural born Coloradoan, I have a deep appreciation for hiking. So yesterday I hiked 2 miles, up 2000 feet, to a freezing cold lake, and jumped into it with only my underwear on! Yup, thats my idea of fun this summer. Tomorrow morning I'm leaving again to go hike the Spanish Peaks. They are 13,000ft mountains but because they are isolated from the rest of the Rocky Mountains, you have to hike up at least 7,000 feet to the summit. Whoop! Let the off-trail backpacking begin!

So here's another quick little thought. I do subscribe to any religion, but I do believe that there is a higher power. This idea was reinforced for me yesterday when I was eating watermelon. If you think about it, watermelons are such a strange fruit. They are green on the outside but when opened they offer a vibrant, red, sweet fruit inside! Its an incredible phenomenon in my opinion, and no amount of science can create anything like that!

Now I'm off to pack!

Peace, Love, and Sunshine,

HAYLEY(: